Um es gleich vorweg zu bloggen: Kunden, die diesen Artikel angesehen haben, haben auch angesehen .... "Aufblasbare Frau" ... Wir waren das nicht. Mit Schwören! (Wir wissen auch nicht wer es war! Aber Hauptsache, die NSA weiß es.) Auch unseren Bloglesern empfehlen wir: "Lehnen Sie sich zurück und genießen Sie eine Sammlung von wörtlich protokollierten Gefechten aus den’ Hallen der Gerechtigkeit, wo Angeklagten und Kläger, Anwälte und Zeugen, Geschworene und Richter, kollidieren um unvergessliche Court Comedy zu produzieren." -
Not all those who wander are lost:
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the
autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No..
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No..
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
-------------------------
Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or
the occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.
Disorder in the Court: Great Fractured Moments in Courtroom History
Sit
back and enjoy a collection of verbatim exchanges from the halls of
justice, where defendants and plaintiffs, lawyers and witnesses, juries
and judges, collide to produce memorably insane comedy.The Court: The charge here is theft of frozen chickens. Are you the defendant, sir?
Defendant: No, sir, I'm the guy who stole the chickens.
Attorney: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
Witness: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'
Attorney: And why did that upset you?
Witness: My name is Susan!
Attorney: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
Witness: Oral...
Attorney: What is your date of birth?
Witness: July 18th.
Attorney: What year?
Witness: Every year.
Defendant: No, sir, I'm the guy who stole the chickens.
Attorney: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
Witness: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'
Attorney: And why did that upset you?
Witness: My name is Susan!
Attorney: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
Witness: Oral...
Attorney: What is your date of birth?
Witness: July 18th.
Attorney: What year?
Witness: Every year.
Und hier schon mal was auf die Schnelle - für den kleinen Humor-Hunger zwischendurch:
Auf YOUTUBE:
https://www.google.de/search?q=disorder+in+court+youtube&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&rls=de.web:de:official&client=firefox&gws_rd=cr&ei=yqKEUsbVAc7RsgbH0YH4Aw
Auch LTO scheint heute einen Spaßtag einzulegen: Unter dem Motto "Die Arbeit des Anwalts - oft vergebens, aber nie umsonst." fragt man dort:
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